Let's play a game.

Helllooooo!
Now we will do a fun activity.
Everyone take the biggest mistake you've
made in your life at this point.
Got it?
ok!
we are going to turn this into an
interactive game for children 4 and up!
Made from corrugated cardboard and glitter,
it will teach kids NEVER to fuck up like you have!
Without them even knowing it!
They will laugh and sing to your problem,
With their innocent little minds you are being
the wise one, in teaching them a wise lesson.

Example A:
"I took large amounts of CRACK. I love CRACK. I did CRACK
ALL the time with my CRACK head friends. Now all i feel is CRACK,
I have no emotion, and i twitch sporadically so i can't even jerk off
without banging my hand against the person sitting next to me in class!
Oh CRACK, my love, why are you so cruel! I can't even do multiplication
anymore as i just fill in CRACK for all the answers. I failed math, science,
English, Spanish, and even my origami class. My life is a pool of dribbling
stooopidity. Gosh, i should have done something besides CRACK, like
my homework."
-Life of a crackhead.

Now the game is simple. We build a board, color in some squares with glitter, have a few six sided die, then just throw in some game pieces made of CRACK. The children are 4 and up, so you don't have to worry about them ingesting anything. Lastly put some epic adventure tale and build creative cards corresponding to the spaces.

The game will be a riot! And thanks to classical "conditioning" the kids will indulge in the sense of feeling and seeing what CRACK is actually like! So when they grow older, and a crackhead tries to deal them crack, they will look at it and be like "NO WAY DUDE! YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO SELL ME GAME PIECES! you wack! stupid motherfuckin' con artist!" They will then proceed to kick the crackheads ass and take all his money.

So, if YOU want your child to be "street smart", and make some money on the side in order to support higher education. Treat them with a game of CRACK! They'll never go back!